Dead vegetables

This is courtesy of a fellow Niles West student’s shirt I saw the other day:

“Do you know how many vegetables had to DIE for your stupid salad?”

That shirt made me happy. Haha.

Vegetarians are pretty funny too. I guess there are two kinds of vegetarians–the ones who do it for the moral/ethical reasons, and the ones who do it for the taste.

Moral/ethical people: Um, we’re at the top of the food chain. It’s our job to eat the animals. If we didn’t, there would just be too many of them!! Think about how much grass would be eaten if there were too many cows. THINK ABOUT THE GRASS!! And if you’re worried about the way they’re killed, just keep kosher, and let the mashkiachs worry about that.

Taste people: If you don’t like the way meat tastes, why does it matter if your “vegetarian” food touched meat once? You can’t taste it. Also, I don’t like oranges (yes, I don’t like oranges), but I’m not going to go around with the people who are against the killing of innocent oranges. Not eating animals because of moral reasons and not eating animals because of their taste, is, well, comparing apples and oranges. If you don’t like the way animals taste, don’t eat them–just be quiet, and don’t go joining PETA.

And next time you eat a salad…think about the poor, innocent vegetables that can no longer live their care-free lives as happy vegetables.

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2 thoughts on “Dead vegetables

  1. Your entry is mostly accurate, and I agree with it.
    But you do have one error.
    “I guess there are two kinds of vegetarians–the ones who do it for the moral/ethical reasons, and the ones who do it for the taste.”

    Correction: There are two kinds of vegetarians–the ones who are idiots, and the ones who… umm. Scratch that, there’s one kind of vegetarian.

    I hope Rachel sees this.
    Of course I already told her about this, before I post’d it, due to an odd coincidence of her IMing me right as I clicked the ‘add comment’ button.
    So in that case, Rachel, you should become a Carnetarian.

    In fact, while we’re at it, all of you dumb vegetarians should become Carnetarians. Your intelligence would improve greatly.

    MMM MEAT

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