I’ve noticed that the more of a hurry I’m in, the slower the lines are at the grocery store.
I’ll be running in to Dominick’s on the way to dinner at a friend’s house, picking up a bouquet of flowers or box of chocolate to give to the hostess. I already spent 10 minutes debating the meaning behind the flowers (roses are too romantic, carnations are too cheap; sunflowers would be perfect!), and much to my chagrin, there’s only one lane open. And correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think I’ve noticed self checkout lines at Dominick’s I normally visit.
At most grocery stores, multiple lanes are open and the cashiers work at a decent pace. (At Target, I heard employees get points for working above certain speeds!) But I figured out the problem at Dominick’s.
Each time I go through the one open lane at Dominick’s, after I’ve spent $7.89 on flowers that say “thank you for hosting me” but not “will you marry me?”, I always get thanked by the cashier.
“Thank you, Ms….Leeehrrrr.”
“Have a nice day, Ms…..Leh-hair.”
“It is always a pleasure serving you and allowing you to buy chocolates and flowers in a light and stress-free environment, Ms….Lrrrrr.”
Has anyone else noticed this? They stare at the receipt, taking my name from from my credit card, trying their darnedest to pronounce my name properly.
I bet employees have to go through rigorous name-pronunciation training. It’s a semester-long class, each week looking at a different culture and country of origin. They probably need to have a special weekend retreat with guest lecturers teaching how to know whether “Levine” is pronounced “leh-veen” or “leh-vine.”
I thank you, Dominick’s, for attempting to personalize my shopping experience. I appreciate the effort, but I’d rather you skip my name, call me “ma’am” or “miss” or “hey you,” and speed up the line so I can spend time with people I actually know.
Once we work on that, we’ll work on fixing your questions. When I’m buying Claritin, a box of tissues, and a box of frozen chicken soup, I laugh to myself whenever you ask me how my day is going. How do you THINK my day is going, Mr……..Smith?