My good friends Seth and Lani recently announced their engagement (congrats again, guys!) and I could not be happier for them. They’re the kind of couple who you meet and think, “Wow, what a good match!” Because I was in attendance the night they first met and I did not horribly screw up their first encounter, I think I’m partially responsible for their happiness.
Last year, I attended the wedding of my friends Ari and Lital, where the theme of the wedding weekend seemed to be that everyone present took credit for their marriage. “It was my idea that they met,” one friend said. “But they first met at MY engagement party!” another claimed. “But I’m the one who set up that couple at whose engagement party Ari and Lital met!” another said.
Jewish tradition says that if you are responsible for setting up three couples who marry, you have a place in the world to come (that’s sort of the Jewish equivalent of heaven). I would very much like to qualify for this prize, but no one I’ve asked (including Google) has any concept of the rules or guidelines.
Here’s where I need clarification on my matchmaking brownie points.
1) In the Seth and Lani story above, I was there the night they met, and right away I knew that they would eventually get married. The other friends in attendance and I made sure to avoid talking to either Seth or Lani to give them a chance to jump right into their relationship. We also made sure that the only spot left in the living room for Lani was on the couch next to Seth. Can I get at least partial credit for this match?
2) I set up two friends of mine in college based on their common interest of the environment. (“OMG, you like trees? I have a friend who also likes trees!!! You guys will be great together!”) They happily dated for a good year or two but then the relationship ended. It’s not MY fault they broke up! Can this still count as a match?
3) The two people in #2 remain good friends, and I’m still holding out for them to get back together. a) Can I get partial credit for giving each of them a good friend, even if it’s not a romantic friend? b) If they do get back together and get married, that credit HAS to go to me, right?
4) What if I help a friend write her JDate profile, and then she meets her husband online? Do I get the points? If you say that JDate gets the points, that’s just not fair – there is no place for websites in the world to come. Or is there?
If anyone can answer my questions, I’d love your suggestions so I can ensure my place in the world to come. Until then – I think I just thought of two people I know who might get along well over their common love for Indian food.